Archive for the ‘business development’ Category

“I hear the garage door open and I feel so torn. My wife and son are home. I’m excited to see them…but I’m right in the middle of work. I have 4 email messages started. And I’m almost ready to send off the project to my client. ” Gary was stuck.

Gary worked from home. In fact he juggled 3 different roles from a home office. He wanted to leave work at 5:15 when he heard the garage door open. But he couldn’t. His body greeted his family at the door, but his mind was still at work.

Ever experience that? You want to leave work at work. But when your garage door opens at the end of the day…where is your head?

Gary felt trapped. There were always so many projects. So many emails awaiting reply. So much work. How could he turn it off?

The BIG gem moment came for Gary when I asked him, “how realistic are you about what can be achieved in a day?”  Hmmm… And “how often do you complete your to-do list for a particular day?”  Never. And that’s completely draining. It’s de-motivating. It makes me feel like I have no control over my work or my time.

This was his impetus. Gary realized he’d fallen victim to the work, instead of leading it. That ticked him off. Something needed to change.

Are you ticked off enough to change the situation? Do you have the energy to change it? Gary found the energy: perhaps his experience will spark something for you. He decided to change what he had control over.

The strategy we created for Gary worked backwards. First he chose the time he would stop working: 5pm. A full 15 minutes before his family arrived home. Secondly he set a 4:30pm alarm on his computer and phone: when it buzzed he had to choose just 1 task to complete. The rest needed to be closed immediately with notes made so he could pick it up tomorrow. And thirdly he set a daily reminder to ring at noon to remind him to look at today’s task list and get real. Decide mid-day which priorities could ACTUALLY be completed this afternoon.

The first day that he followed the strategy he realized he was unrealistic. He planned way too much in a day. And in so doing, he didn’t tackle the true priorities. They were buried in would-be-nice tasks. As he expected, it was hard on that first day to close things up at 4:30pm and focus on completing just 1 task in the final half hour.

But what he hadn’t anticipated was how amazingly productive he felt at 5pm. For the first time in years Gary paused to feel proud of what he achieved that day. That final 15 minutes was a gift of reflection. He was proud and he was confident that when tomorrow morning came, he’d be ready to dive into those items he had to close up tonight. When the garage door opened that night his body and his mind were fully standing at the door awaiting the hello hugs.

When your garage door opens where is your mind?

You can get real with your time. You can choose to close email and projects. You can choose to turn off your phone. You can select the real priorities. And you don’t need to do it alone. Ask a colleague or boss or friend or coach for help. Don’t wait any longer. You deserve to feel that sense of achievement and confidence…today!

Isn’t that what it’s really all about – when the garage door opens at the end of the work day? That’s the important stuff: that’s living the life you want. This is the year…stop trying and start doing it!

Sally sighed on the other end of the phone line, “Rhonda, I try to meet new people, but I’m just not connecting with them. Frankly, a lot of them are boring.”  It was our second coaching session. Sally had recently moved to a new city and was trying to connect with people: to build a circle of colleagues, make friends, and hopefully meet a man. She was doing all the right things: going to networking events and joining groups that interested her. But she just wasn’t connecting.

So I gave her a challenge: with the very next person you meet, keep asking questions until you find just ONE thing you can connect on. She agreed.

One week later she called to say, “I had my BIG gem moment Rhonda—I’m a snob. I hear someone share a little info, I think I’ve figured them out, so I tune out. I put people in a little box and plunk them on the shelf labelled ‘boring’. I’m a snob!” 

I think if we’re really honest, there might be a tiny snob within each one of us.

I know I’ve made quick judgements of people, only to realize later, that I hadn’t asked enough questions. In fact years ago one of my favourite colleagues was someone I labelled as obnoxious and overbearing when we first met.

So think about the people in your life that you have judged to be boring or annoying or “insert-label-here”. Did you ask enough questions?

The next time you see that person, or the next time you attend a networking event, recognize that your Sally-the-snob might peak out. Before she has that person you’re talking to ”all figured out“ ask a few more questions. Don’t plunk them on the shelf in a neat and tidy box quite yet. Perhaps that person is just the friend or colleague you’ve been looking for after all.    

* Watch the video clip of Rhonda telling this story in a recent Out with Schmooze presentation. Read more about the Out with Schmooze keynote here so you can spice up your next conference and actually connect with your colleagues! 

** starting 2 BLOG posts ago (Who am I aspiring to be?) I committed to share my client’s BIG gems in this forum. If you want to read about my own BIG gem moments, check out the newsletters archives here.

It’s been over a week since I stepped onto my treadmill. Yet 3 minutes and 20 seconds after starting a run I’m struck by a brilliant idea. It’s like my treadmill is a magic idea machine! This time the idea is for this blog: I need to write about my clients gems. Just 1 BIG gem at a time. Get their permission of course. And tell THEIR story. So that’s what I’m going to do. Watch for my very first client BIG gem tomorrow.

But before that, back to my magic idea machine. My husband Dave estimates our treadmill was built in 1986. The brand name is Free Spirit which would suggest it might actually be a relic of the 1960s. The belt whirs so loudly it would drown out a smoke alarm. Next to the golf-ball-sized twisty-knob speed adjustment is the bold acronym VEO. That stands for visually enhanced optics. I can only assume that refers to the oversize ticking numbers on the display, like one might see on an 18 year old clock radio on the bedside of your near-sighted great-grandmother. These are GIANT numbers.  And, of course, one can’t forget to mention the strip of wood paneling along the base.

Are you getting the picture?

Yet, despite all this, it is literally a magic idea machine. I get stumped at work…I don my runners, leap on that worn creaky tread, and minutes later, a BIG gem idea hits me! My buddy suggested that it might be the fact that I’m moving my body (instead of hunching over my keyboard) that gets the ideas flowing. But I’m sticking with the magic idea machine concept. Mmmmm…magic.

My friend and colleague Troy Payne talks about magic. Often it’s the magic created between people. The energy that’s created when colleagues brainstorm. Or when friends connect to support each other.

I’ve felt a magic in the clients I’ve coached lately. I’m really present with them and really connected. We’re plugged into the same mission: to achieve their goals and uncover something deeper. The questions I’m posing are causing shifts. And in that I’m discovering the truly powerful questions. It’s inspiring changes to my keynotes and workshops that really gels the concepts of one BIG gem I’ve been working with for nearly 10 years. It’s synergy. It’s exciting. It truly feels magical. So as a way to ACT on this latest BIG gem I’ll be writing about the powerful questions that have helped these clients have their BIG gem discoveries right here in the BIG GEM blog.

How might you tap into your creativity today? Do you need to move your body to shake off the cobwebs and come up with a better solution? Who can you connect with to generate renewed energy?

Join the conversation – write below to tell me what inspires your great ideas.  Here’s to a magical day filled with BIG gem ideas!

What’s with the rubber edging around your shoes? Are those shoes going to play bumper cars with other rubber edged shoes?

That’s right. My sister Amanda was talking about my shoes. She posed this particular zinger this summer as she stared down at my comfy shoes. The shoes I love wearing on stage, out for drinks, to the park. Yes…most of my shoes do have rubber edging. It’s not cool, but it’s what I’ve worn for years, ever since I swore off high-heals.

That all changed last month. I found myself hunting for a pair of boots to match an amazing new dress I’d bought. And there I was, trying on non-rubber-edged heals…and liking them!

The whole decision was loaded with meaning. You see, I was in the midst of redefining myself in my career (this new web design is part of that) and even in my life.

So suddenly it had nothing to do with the shoes. The shoes had become a metaphor – the BIGger question was, Who am I? And who do I want to be…in work and in life?

Do I wear a bumper-car-flat shoe (steady, grounded and comfortable) or a saucy-healed-boot (adventurous and bold)? Which is the genuine me? Switching shoe styles felt akin to a personality overhaul!

Marcus Buckingham, in his book Go Put your Strengths to Work says that as we grow in our careers “we become more of who we already are.” So if that’s the case, who am I?

It took another conversation (less sarcastic on her part) for me to have the BIG gem moment. I don’t need to choose just one element to define me. I’m evolving. I’m exploring different ways of expressing myself in work (and apparently in fashion). I can wear both types of shoes until one no longer feels genuine. I don’t need to pressure myself to pick now.

So here are a few “stop trying…start doing!” questions for you:
- How might you “try on a new pair of shoes” this month? In work? In life?
- If you’re an entrepreneur, remember that you and your business are separate entities. It’s okay if you are in fact MORE than your business. It’s very difficult to capture ALL that you are in your business – it’s image and marketing and style. How might you cut yourself some slack and allow yourself to evolve in the business and outside of it?

If this entry inspired a BIG gem for you tell us about it! What BIG gem are you committing to this month. Focus on one. Act on one. Just one BIG gem!